so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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