explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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