How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
my liver is dry heaving
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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