he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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