Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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