she looked like the bat from fern gully.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
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What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
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We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
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