No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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