she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Randomize
