She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
