I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
