i would punch a child for taco bell
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
