My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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