How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize