toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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