just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
home. puking in laundry basket.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
