He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
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