And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize