Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize