I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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