I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize