Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
