Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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