called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
