areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
