I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
someone owes me an orgasm
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
