careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I could fuck to npr.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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