i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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