Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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