i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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