that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
