Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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