I hate your face
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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