But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize