good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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