i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
