At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Randomize