please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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