We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
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I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
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He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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