What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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