someone get that fucking seahorse.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
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she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
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I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize