we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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