hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
