Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
there's paper in my vomit.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Enjoy the penises
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
