Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
