I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
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