drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Randomize
