Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
