dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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