I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
