Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize