Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
